Kristin & Ryan – The Kidd Family Blog

My parents were converted and gripped by the Grace of the Lord Jesus when I was a baby. So I enjoyed the blessings of an evangelical and bible-believing church community growing up. But about age 6 as the congregation celebrated the Lord’s Supper I remember distinctly the conviction of my sin and feeling that I was unworthy. For the next six years or so I struggled sometimes with obedience to my parents. But my deepest struggle was conviction of my personal lostness, as the gospel was preached, through family worship, and through Bible memorization. As I neared age 12 I developed a sophisticated “Calvinist” understanding that I could not be saved because I wasn’t chosen. I figured I was condemned to be miserable forever fearing eternal damnation in hell.

When I was about 13 God demolished my sophistication. I understood and embraced the offer of the gospel which is free and open for all who would rest in Jesus like little Children. I was baptized and continued to participate actively in the fellowship and discipleship ministries of the church.

Attending a government high school during grades 9-11 I faced some challenges to my faith. Being stubborn and independent I was largely unaffected by the beliefs and lifestyles of peers and teachers. In grade 11 I had opportunities to debate with an evolutionist friend, a Jehovah’s Witness friend, a feminist English teacher, and even the principal about the truthfulness of the Christian faith.

The experience of these conversations planted a seed of doubt in my mind. Are we all just conditioned into our parents’ religion? Shouldn’t young people be intellectually honest and evaluate objectively the faith they inherit? After all I might have been born into the Islamic faith. That summer I spent considerable time deliberating over these questions, and I dabbled in some critical thinking and atheistic philosophy texts.

In the end I concluded that the alternative faith perspectives offered nothing but autonomy — man’s basic impulse to define a lesser god and invent his own way of self-salvation. The opponents of Christianity weren’t offering sound arguments, but rather excuses justifying rebellion and immorality. By contrast, Christian faith offers a coherent rational justification for the human experience, providing a basis for morals, beauty, logic, and hope. Christian faith is not only intellectually satisfying as a philosophy, but it adequately accounts the “facts” of the world from the fields of linguistics, archeology, geology, biology, physics, etc.

In the final analysis, however, my belief in a personal God and my trust in the Lord Jesus to cleanse me of my guilt are based on a personal conversion experience. God shattered my stubborn rebellion and independence, leaving me with a personal knowledge and love for him. The same thing needs to happen to each son or daughter of Adam.

My life is now committed body and soul to the service of my Saviour who died for me. All I have, all I am, and all I ever hope to be is dedicated to the worship and service of the Creator-God who owns me. May the Lord use me for some great good before He calls me home, to an eternal rest in a restored paradise.